Well, guys, I officially live in Brooklyn now and it. is. the. best. Seriously, let me just break this down for you. Our new place is a big step up in terms of niceness: the fixtures are gorgeous, there's way more closet space, the design is really open, there's a washer/dryer in the apartment, we're up … Continue reading To ruminate or not to ruminate; that is the question
rumination
Well, that was unexpected
So... The dude and I got engaged! I know. It's very exciting. And if you're wondering, we don't have a date yet. We were celebrating my birthday last month: I came home to a house with all of the chores done, he made me burgers(yum), and we watched some of the Great British Bake Off. … Continue reading Well, that was unexpected
What I’ve learned from Lenny
We're nearing the end of the school year, and I've got to be honest: I am SO ready. I've been ready since November. This year has been incredibly difficult, and while I'm proud of myself for managing anxiety throughout, I'm ready for a break. This shit is hard, guys, and I'm working really hard to … Continue reading What I’ve learned from Lenny
What no one tells you when they tell you they have anxiety.
Or: when you're diagnosed with anxiety. I know that when my therapist and I first talked about the diagnosis, we talked only about the symptoms I was dealing with at the time. We didn't talk about others that were possible, or likely, or what might trigger them, mostly because we were so focused on what … Continue reading What no one tells you when they tell you they have anxiety.
Anxiety is an endurance race that ever ends and that no one sees you training for
You know those times when nothing huge has happened, but somehow things like not sleeping well, a transition, and/or something hanging over your head has your anxiety like This was me for the last week and a half. The reason I kind of dropped off the face of the earth is that we went on … Continue reading Anxiety is an endurance race that ever ends and that no one sees you training for
How anxiety makes me second-guess my emotions
Recently I've had a couple of experiences where I've been feeling things way more strongly than I usually do. Some of this is in my personal life, some not. Some things shifted at work, and even though my work husband did me a solid and gave me a heads up about it before they announced … Continue reading How anxiety makes me second-guess my emotions
I don’t need you to manage my anxiety, but I do need you to be mindful of it.
One of the things about anxiety that's most difficult for me on a day-to-day basis is the rumination. While it's easy to explain to people how thoughts or topics get stuck in your brain, what's not easy to explain is why they get stuck there. Or how stupid you feel for not being able to let … Continue reading I don’t need you to manage my anxiety, but I do need you to be mindful of it.
When anxiety means trusting the thing that makes you anxious
Sometimes I just cannot figure my brain out. Most times when anxiety rears its head these days, I'm like oh, you, breathe for a bit, and then I'm good. But sometimes it seems like I can do all of the things I know to do, things that usually work, and still the anxiety is like … Continue reading When anxiety means trusting the thing that makes you anxious
Still, after all this time
You know what really gets to me? How after years of therapy and all the rest, anxiety still gets to be like Nope, I'm in charge now and do whatever the fuck it wants until I calm down. I went to bed early last night because, even though I've been going to bed on time, teaching … Continue reading Still, after all this time
More on the physical effects of anxiety
So, here's the thing. Anxiety is mad physical. We forget that. Commonly, we talk about the emotional and mental toll that conditions like Generalized Anxiety Disorder take on us, but those of us in the know have a whole different take on things. I've written about physical symptoms of the different types of anxious days … Continue reading More on the physical effects of anxiety
it's only fear 